Thursday, July 25, 2013

"No, your 7 year old is not 'saved'"

"There is no such thing as a Christian child; only a chid of Christian parents." - Richard Dawkins, The God Delusion

Considering the fact that I identify as a Christian, it may seem strange that I am quoting Richard Dawkins, or that I'm bringing up the issue of religion in children at all.  You have likely heard Dawkins talk about it, but as a theist, I thought I would give my two cents.

So, if you didn't know, I was raised as a Christian.  I went to a Baptist Church when I was young, every Sunday up until I was around 4, if I remember correctly.  After that I hardly went, mainly because my parents wanted a church that played traditional music and did not feel as if they fit in anywhere.  Because I have not went to church regularly in over a decade, I still know very little about my own religion.  Over the years I have simply accepted the Bible as fact.

In 2011, however, I began hearing about the subject of same-sex marriage a lot.  It has always been in the news, but I had never noticed before then.  My parents told me growing up that gay marriage was wrong and against the Bible, and made negative comments every time a new state legalized it, so at that point, I had never known anything else.  Anyway, over the course of the year I met some people and did some research that completely changed my perspective (thank God).  Throughout all this however, I ran across one argument that really stuck in my head.  Basically, it said that since no one follows the other laws in the Bible (no mixing fabrics, no rounded hair cuts, no divorce), they have no right to tell gays not to marry.  It all went downhill from there. . .

To make the long, pathetic story short, I became a very confused person, and though I do obviously support gay marriage, religion screws me more every day.  Reading this, you probably assume that since I skipped Church for most of my life, I did not have much of a religious background anyways, and I guess that's true, after about 5 years old that is.  However, it was always stuck in the back of my head and was pushed at me during a child's prime years of development, which makes it very hard to look at other views without bias.

I understand why my parents, or anyone for that matter, would bring their children up with a religious background.  It does make sense that parents would want their children to view the world in the same way, and when I have kids, I suppose I do hope their views are somewhat similar to mine.

But what I don't understand is why parents push religion so early on, when they are not willing to bring up things such as sex or childbirth.  My parents told me that most of the world was going to hell before I even knew what masturbation was.  If you think about it, really, that's pretty messed up - telling your sweet, innocent CHILDREN that they are going to endure endless torment in the fiery pit of hell unless they accept Jesus Christ as their savior.

 I was always told that the reason I was "saved" so early in my life was so that if something were to happen, I would go to heaven, which I have major problems with.  If you think God is the type of person (Deity? Authority figure?) that would send innocent children, that have done nothing wrong - to Hell. . . explain to me again why you worship this guy?

It just seems like Christianity as we view it is a very convenient religion.  My mom told me two days ago, in these exact words, "No, being a good person doesn't matter." in relation to how we get into heaven.

The worst part is the fact that people will actually tell others - whether it be at the church or just on the streets - that their kids are religious and just got "saved".  Well, I hate to be the one that bursts your bubble, but your children are not saved.  They probably had no idea what you were talking about.  They probably just didn't want to disappoint you.  You never hear about 6 year old democrats or republicans.  You never hear about vegan children.  Why?  Because those things come with intellect and maturity!  How could you think religion is any different?

The point I wanted to make here is that, essentially, children are far too ignorant about the world around them to make an intelligent decision about the religion they want to follow.  I was too young when it was pushed on me, and who knows - maybe I'm still too young.  Maybe I'll never be solid in my faith.  Maybe I'll flip flop back and forth my entire life.  But I think that's okay.  No matter what you believe, no one can say that they know with absolute certainty what's out there.  Whether you want to admit it or not, we're all agnostic to some extent.

When I have children, I won't take them to church.  I won't expose them to religion.  I will wait, and let them decide for themselves.  I won't have them Baptized before they can say the word, and I won't push my beliefs on them.  If God really wants us to have free will - and I think he does - I'm sure he won't mind.

Monday, July 22, 2013

Water on Mars - What's Really Out There?

Being the huge nerd I am, when I discovered more evidence had been found pointing to water on Mars, I was pretty stoked.  I mean, it could answer one of life's biggest questions: Are we alone in the universe?  Humanity has been asking that questions for thousands of years, and everyone seems to think something different.  For example, my mother thinks believing there is anything else out there is stupid and naive.  I, however, think life on other planets is somewhat probable.

It seems lately a plethora of new research has been found and in the past 24 hours, the possibility of an ocean ever existing on Mars has been trending (along with the royal baby, of course).  Mars has been under close scrutiny for years and we seem to be getting the same information over and over: It may have supported life at one time, but humans could not live there because of its lacking oxygen and water.  The Mars rover Curiosity landed last year and this may be the most exciting information we've gotten since then.

Regarding the issue of life on other planets, (which is in fact, the point.  I got sidetracked) we really don't have any evidence either way.  No matter how you think we all ended up here, you must admit that the Earth is an anomaly.  The other planets in our Solar System are desolate and empty (as far as we know).  To give us answers, we generally rely on the same things we rely on for answers pertaining to everything else:  Science and Religion.

If you know anything about either of these, you have probably noticed that both tend to be very Earth-centric and therefore don't give us much information on what else is out there.  I suppose that makes sense, considering we have never actually been anywhere outside of Earth other than the moon, but it makes forming a stance on this issue quite difficult.

Of the two, religion seems to be less open to anyplace other than Earth supporting life.  The Bible, for example, (which I am referencing because of the many religions that follow it and my personal understanding of it) tends to centralize Earth with its mention of "the heavens and Earth".  Revelations, which is supposedly prophecy, seems to revolve around Earth's destruction and mentions no other planets.  This leads me to think that either God created only one Earth, or the other planets have no sin. The former seems more likely, but also makes no sense, as I have to wonder why God would have bothered creating the rest of the universe.  Finally, this leads me to the conclusion that either pieces of the Bible were lost in translation, or God has not told us the whole story.

Science lends a different viewpoint, which in some ways makes more sense, as it leaves possibilities open, letting our understanding grow and change with time.  Science suggests that many Solar Systems exist like ours and that they might consist of planets supporting intelligent life (In which case, we're all screwed.  All our satellites and crap would be hard to miss).

I tend to never side with Science, and I'm not necessarily doing that here.  The Earth is too perfect to be a mistake, or the result of a big bang in space.  The alignment of the stars, gravity, the atmosphere that protects us from the outside: there is no way all that could have magically appeared.  Earth is perfect, in my opinion.  It's mankind that's not, which is why I have such a complicated relationship with Science.  But I can't help believing there has to be something else out there.

I can't be just Earth.  If it is, why does Mars even exist for us to find an ocean on?  Why have we spent so much of ourselves trying to find out if there is, in fact, nothing to find?  If humans are so evil and horrible sinners, why would a world exist solely for us?  Are we just the most entertaining of God's creations?

You can probably see at this point that I am quite confused.  There is so much I don't understand, and some things I think humanity will never know.  All I know is that we cannot be alone.  There is too much beyond our understanding: witchcraft, dreams, existence, space.  These things must have an answer, an explanation.  Even if it's just a bunch of little green creatures in the galaxy over, there has to be someone watching.



Friday, July 19, 2013

Top 3 Reasons I Am Not a Vegan

A fact that most people don't know about me is that I love to study nutrition.  Well, I suppose if they've looked in my refrigerator they do.  I became very interested in it about a year ago, and while I wasn't as much of a hippie back then, I started eating better. Meanwhile, my family thought I was developing an eating disorder, but that's a story for another day.  Other than being the only high schooler to turn down a Snickers bar, I also started to think about veganism.

I had read a million articles, seen a million news stories, and they all claimed a vegan diet could lower cholesterol, clear skin, and improve hygiene.  Not only that, but people also claimed to have lost weight and gained muscle as a vegan.  I did not want to lose weight, (though I'd never turn down a little extra muscle) but this was still intriguing to me, loving animals as I do.  And yet, to this day I am still a happy carnivore.  Why? These are my top 3 reasons:


(1)  I do not believe a vegan diet is the healthiest for me.
About a year ago, when I began eating fruits and vegetables for the first time in my life, I had some. . . intestinal problems.  I am fairly certain this is normal, and I know my body could adjust, but I don't think I could ever be as healthy on a vegan diet as I am currently, which just goes to show how everyone is different.  Vegans tend to take in a surplus of carbohydrates, and my body does not respond particularly well to these, especially grains.  Despite there being vegan sources, I respond much better to animal protein.


(2)  I like fat!
Butter, steak, eggs, bacon - all among my favorite foods.  I know I could still have coconut and other nuts (is coconut a nut - I'm not sure), but it's just not the same.  I would take generic butter over fancy, unrefined, cold pressed olive oil any day.  My body also responds well to fat, as my skin has gotten considerably brighter and clearer, and my hair healthier.  I have more energy on a higher fat diet and I never feel slow or sluggish.  It is easier to take in enough calories and my food tastes better.  I'm not worried about health problems either, such as heart attack or stroke (which I will likely post about sometime soon).  In short, I will not be giving up my fat.


(3) Going vegan does not alter the big picture that much.
I left this reason for last because it may be quite lengthy, as I still don't have a solid opinion on the issue.  Basically, I have always thought there must be a reason that animals cannot speak or express themselves in the same way we can.  If you are a Christian, you may recall that the Bible says nothing about whether animals go to heaven or not.  I must assume they do not, as it would explain a lot of things.  Many believe the reason for our place in the food chain and in nature is absence of a soul in the animal kingdom.  This seems the most likely theory, in my opinion.  Despite wondering at the reason for it, I do believe that humans have dominion over animals.

First of all, understand that I am in no way defending man's torture of animals.  I am fully aware of the hell they go through and the evils of slaughterhouses.  I've watched most of the video clips on PETA's website as well as done a lot research myself, and yet, it is not enough to turn me into a vegan.  Yes, I hate it.  Yes, I wish it would stop.  Yes, sometimes I feel like murdering some of those slaughterhouse workers.  But will going vegan really accomplish anything?

The only way we can stop this is by fighting for animal rights.  Going vegan does not alter the big picture significantly.  Maybe if we all stopped eating animal products, it would, but that will NEVER happen.  Put simply, going vegan is like watching a fist fight.  You watch, you wish you could go break it up, but you don't.  You stand there and wait for it to be over.  If you want the fight to end though, you have to stand up and go against it.  "Not participating" earns you no bragging rights.


In conclusion, those are my reasons for being a carnivore.  I hope it made sense, and you saw more than just a page full of jumbled words.  If you are vegan, I would love to hear your opinion, as seeing both sides is always beneficial.  I guess all that's left to say at this point is, "Pass the bacon!"
Or broccoli.  That's cool too.



Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Don't Call Little Girls "Pretty"

Today, I think I'll start with a story.

Without going into too much detail, I just found out a week ago that my grandfather is dying.  He has 3 months to live, supposedly, which isn't at all relevant to this post other than that it explains why all of a sudden my long lost relatives are popping up left and right.  I don't remember half these people, considering I have not seen them in over a decade, so we had to spend a little while going through that awkward, "Oh, how you've grown!  Do you have a boyfriend yet?" stage.

So a couple days ago, my great aunt and uncle came to visit.  But when I went to my grandparents house the for the obligatory couple hours of small talk, the first thing my aunt commented on was how "pretty" I was.  I don't know them well, so we couldn't really do the awkward hugging thing.  They don't know me well, so I guess it was just a good conversation starter, whether it was true or not.  So it got me thinking: is commenting on physical appearance doing more harm than good?

Think about it.  How many times have you complimented a friend on new clothes, or a hair cut, or their manicure?  How many times have you heard your relatives point out your appearance before you're even an arm's length away?

It makes sense, obviously.  The first things humans notice is appearance.  We use appearance to judge people's intentions, thoughts, moods.  We notice changes.  So when your friend comes up to you with a new haircut, you notice.  They expect you to, and if you don't, they point it out.  They want you to compliment them, because that is what society considers "polite". 

We say these things so often that they have become instinct.  You say it, even if you don't mean it.  And in my eyes, it's pointless, and maybe even a little detrimental.

This mostly applies to little girls - you know, before puberty.  My grandmother used to call me pretty all the time.  Or I guess I should say, she used to comment on my appearance all the time.  I don't remember her ever congratulating me on anything that actually mattered, though I'm sure she did.  She probably called me after my 2nd grade awards ceremony, after my choir performances.  But guess what?  I don't remember any of that, because for her, it always seemed like my appearance was the most important thing about me.

I suppose it's not her fault, and I don't blame her, but the point is that those thing stick out in a child's mind.  I remember one time specifically, when we were looking at pictures of me as a baby.  I was around 8 at the time, and she was showing me a picture in which I was 18 months.  I remember her giggling and pinching my arm, saying how chubby I was as a child.  It pisses me off that I remember that.  It pisses me off that I can't remember my kindergarten graduation, but I remember this, as well as all the other negative comments. The mole on my neck, my dirty hair (which was dirty because I was too busy doing all the things kids should do to wash it). 

Not that it was always my grandmother, because it wasn't.  My mom did it too - while trying on clothes, or shopping (gosh, I hated that), or by telling me I could never wear a strapless dress.  Looking back, I wasn't overweight AT ALL.  I was a skinny kid, and I still have a somewhat good metabolism.  I am not complaining about my life by any means, because I had a good childhood, and these days I consider myself a very confident person.  I'm just telling you how it was for me.

I know other girls went through this too, and I know they probably had it worse than I did, in most cases.  But I'm getting off topic again.  Obviously, you shouldn't make negative comments, but how can it harm a girl to tell her she's pretty?

Well, first of all, it doesn't mean anything.  People throw around compliments all day long, and kids especially, are used to being admired.  By dwelling on how "cute" they are, all you are doing is showing them that the first thing and most important thing people will notice about them is their physical appearance.  Not their personality.  Not how hardworking they are.  NO.  These things don't matter, as long as you're pretty, right?

On that note, it makes me want to strangle a kitten when I hear people say, "Oh, you're going to be so pretty one day."  When a child hears that, what do you think it does?  Do you think they take it as a compliment.  NO.  You are simply enforcing the idea that they are not good enough.  But hey, they might be some day.

The crappiest thing of all is that those people who make all the little comments are not at fault.  They are just fellow victims of our close minded, brainwashed society.  Our environment is entirely to blame, and it makes me so MAD.  I know it wasn't always like this.  There wasn't always a bathroom scale behind everyone's toilet.  Girls didn't always learn about how to lose weight before learning what sex was.  People used to just eat when they were hungry.  They used to have bacon with breakfast and cook with lard.  They used to live.

What happened?

Society brainwashed us all. That's what happened.  So now here we are, with anorexia, and heart disease, and God knows what else.  Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so what business do you have telling a girl whether she's beautiful or not?  Let her enjoy the few years of bliss she will ever have.  Don't you dare tell her she needs to lose weight.  And think it through before you tell her she's pretty.

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Leviticus and Gay Marriage

Gay marriage.  For the past decade, it's been a hot topic in the news, and it seems everyone has an opinion.  Even children as young as 9 and 10 are speaking out on the issue.  People have discussed and debated, and it seems a new state legalizes it every year.  I am not the first to speak of it and I surely won't be the last.  Despite there being many reasons for people to oppose same sex marriage, today I will be addressing the one that most of my family tends to stick to: religion.

If you know anything about me, you know I grew up in a Christian household, and am a Christian myself.  I never went to church much, as my parents never thought they fit in anywhere (though I think they're just picky - traditional music?  Good luck).  Despite that however, my family has visited numerous churches, and I have to say that a majority of the people there oppose gay marriage, including my parents and brother.

Why?

Well, the argument I hear the most comes straight from the Bible, and the most popular verse on the issue is located in Leviticus 20:13

"If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable.  They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads."

There are other verses that supposedly address homosexuality, but for the sake of argument, I will reference this one.  As you can see above, the verse is very clear in what it says and leaves little room for false interpretation.  People have used it to defend bigotry for years, and despite the rise in LGBT supporters, they still cling to these feeble defenses.

Let's start with the location of this verse: The Old Testament, Book of Leviticus.

For those of you who are not familiar with the Bible, The Old Testament was written before Jesus was born and sacrificed himself for our sins, which many Christians use to justify some of the laws that they do not follow today.  Leviticus is mainly about the Levites - a group of Priests - and the laws they needed to learn in order to do their jobs correctly.  Leviticus reads like a rule book, of sorts.  Among these laws is a verse about homosexuality, written above.

If you ask a Christian about Leviticus, they will probably avoid your questioning.  My mother told me to read the New Testament, as it is more relevant to our lives today.  She told me Leviticus was "a little extreme".  Actually reading most of Leviticus, I can see that this is an understatement.  Among the endless rules:

"Any person who curseth his mother or father, must be killed." (Leviticus 20:9)

"If a man has sex with a woman on her period, they are both to be 'cut off from their people'"(Leviticus 20:18)

"No man who has any defect may come near: no man who is blind or lame, disfigured or deformed" (Leviticus 21:18)

Not to mention the verses about mixing fabrics and eating bacon.  Understand that I am in no way bashing the Bible, as I am a Christian, but clearly,  Leviticus is not followed in today's society even by the most religious of people.  How many church goers do you know that are divorced?  The Bible speaks out just as - if not more - strongly against divorce, and yet people think nothing of it.

So why decide to follow one verse, but not the rest of Leviticus?  I have no idea.  Do people just think it's fun to pick on Gays?  This will always be a mystery to me.  Religion gets more confusing every day, and I will never truly understand it all.  I admit, I don't follow most of the Bible and I don't go around praying for everything I do "wrong".

What I want to get across in this post is that if you are religious, and if you oppose gay marriage for the reasons listed above, you are a bigoted hypocrite.  It may sound harsh, but that is my opinion and always will be.

You CANNOT use Leviticus to justify homophobia.  You CANNOT pick and choose from the Bible just because you fear what you may find in the rest.  To those of you who stand by me in wanting same sex marriage legalized, bless you.  It's people like you that force me to cling to faith in humanity.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Cussing, Cursing, Swearing, Censoring. . . My thoughts.

I was inspired to write this post by my mom, who has always thought that swearing is wrong, and claims she has never done it in her life . . . sure.  Anyway, as you can see by the title, today I will be discussing whether swearing is wrong and why, in fact, it should be considered foul language.
So, to get it out of the way, my stance on swearing as of right now is that it is not, in general, wrong. 

I admit, when I was 7, I was one of those annoying kids who would gasp and feel my heart rate increase every time I heard a "bad" word.  If my parents were watching a TV show, and one of the characters said anything even the slightest bit foul, I would drop everything and stare at the TV like I had seen a ghost (though, I guess I might have - my mom loves Ghost Whisperer).

These days, not so much.  I hear it all the time - school, television, music, the Internet, on the streets.  It rubs off, and mimicry is only natural.  I have never actually said a "bad" word before, but I can't help thinking them, and I guarantee - unless a bomb drops out of the sky in the next 30 minutes - I will probably let one slip before I die.  Yes, I feel guilty when I almost curse, or think a word in my head, but should I?

I would like to point out that despite arguments against curse words, (makes you sound unintelligent, there's no need for it, the Bible warns against it, etc.) they are just words.  WORDS!  In essence, SOUNDS!  So what I don't understand is why people go out of their way to avoid saying them, especially around children.

Curse words, just like all other words, are completely harmless on their own.  When you were a kid, did you cry when someone cussed?  Did the word physically or mentally hurt you?  NO!  If you cried, it was because someone called you fat or ugly, not because someone said an "inappropriate" word after dropping their pencil.  What I want to get across here is that if you cuss, you are saying a word.  A completely harmless word.

On that note, my family especially thinks foul language is wrong because you are using the word to describe things it was not initially intended to say.  But what about using the words "gay" or "piss".  Gay means happy.  Piss means to urinate.  Despite the fact that most people do not consider the use of these words cussing, by the definition above, it is.  "Bitch" is technically the word used to refer to a female dog.  In using it to describe a person, you are misusing in the same way you would be by calling someone "gay".

The next issue with swearing (which I hear a lot in my family) is that the Bible warns against it. . .

SERIOUSLY?  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  THAT'S YOUR ARGUMENT?

Before going on I will say I am a christian, and I do not want to go into religious topics, so I'll be brief.  Basically, my problem with this is that the Bible was written years ago.  Things have changed.  The bible also says homosexuals don't deserve to live (more on that another day), that you can't mix fabrics, that - I don't even know, a bunch of ridiculous things.

 My point is that if you are basing everything you do off of the Bible, you will spend your life driving yourself crazy.  We can't understand most things the Bible says - Heck, God didn't even write it!  Not only that, but do you have any idea how much translation the original text has gone through?  So please, don't go around saying you don't swear because the Bible says not to.

So far, I may sound like I have no problem with swearing, but I do.  Contrary to everything I have just said, I do believe swearing to be inappropriate in certain situations.  In some ways, it all boils down to respect for other people.  If your friends don't care, great.  But if your mom is uncomfortable with that kind of language, you probably shouldn't say things like that around her.  That goes for my family too.  If I did cuss, I wouldn't around them because they don't like it.  Around kids, I watch my language even if it's just things like "crap" or "piss", because their parents probably don't want me teaching them things.

 Overall, I think that as humans we over analyze everything to the point we don't leave any room for living.  If you accidentally curse when you spill milk on the floor, you will not be condemned to Hell.  Life will go on as usual.  I don't curse because I don't see a need for it and because my family doesn't like it, but if I ever do, I certainly won't dwell on it.

Friday, July 5, 2013

Injured and attacked by a bloodsucking parasite. . .

Hello! How are you, my lovely, imaginary readers?

I sincerely hope you are doing better than I am.

If you wonder what I could possibly mean by that, you probably haven't ever tried to workout outside at 6:30 AM, in Texas, wearing practically nothing.

Just kidding. . . I was wearing a tank top and shorts :)

Anyways, the reason I was working out outside is that (1) I have a small house, and (2) my parents like to sleep in, (as I assume most self respecting people do during the summer - excluding myself, of course) and burpees are perhaps not the quietest of things I could be doing at the butt crack of dawn.

So, it's my first morning ever working out outside, and I wake up in a good mood, craving some fresh air and sunshine. I change into workout clothes, throw my hair in a ponytail and lace up my sneakers all with a smile on my face until. . .

I realize my mom sleeping on the couch.

Ok, I think to myself. It's okay. I'll just get out there really fast and try not to disturb her.

Well, I manage to (kinda) get out there quietly. She didn't wake up, at least.

So now I'm outside, the breeze hitting my face and the air pleasantly cool as it is before 8:00 every morning. I warmup, stretch, and start a circuit workout, feeling like I could take over the world.

Until the second exercise. Pushups.

Now, before you start with the, "oh, come on Victoria, it's just grass. You can touch grass!", let me just say, I love being outside. I don't mind walking out bare foot, or laying down on the ground, but bugs. . .

No. Just no.

If you don't recall, I live in Texas, and there are bugs EVERYWHERE. Not cockroaches and things, I can deal with those. I mean the tiny little annoying gnats that fly around like their sole purpose is making the nicest of people want to shoot a kitten in the head (not that I would do that - I love kittens).

Ok, back to the story.
I decide to just suck it up. After all, you never heard Katniss complain about the harmless little critters. I drop to the ground, prepared to complete the most well executed push-ups I have ever attempted when I get a face (and mouth) full of bugs.

I complete my push-ups anyway, praying for the 20th to come, and hop up, successful avoiding a mid workout snack of insects. Now just 4 more rounds. . .

I end up toughing it out, if you're wondering, and put myself through it a couple more times, not wanting to bother my family. On Monday, however, I injured my neck (spine, back?) which put a stop to any type of physical activity, outside or otherwise. But that's not the point.

On Wednesday, I noticed the back of my leg itching. I have no idea how I didn't notice before, but when I took a look at myself in my full length mirror, I found a huge red spot the size of a baseball. One of those little suckers was clearly not a gnat.

So, I ignored it, because I would rather chop off my own leg than resort to medicine (maybe a bit of an exaggeration).

It got bigger. Placement was likely the main issue, with it being right inside my knee, where my pants rub up against it 24/7.

At this point I was miserable. I mentioned it to my mom a couple times but she didn't really say anything, so I just let it alone.
Then, yesterday, when she woke up, my mom noticed it, while I was wearing shorts so as not to irritate it.

She freaked out. Cellulitis, apparently. At this point I had no choice but to just do whatever would help, which included - despite my protest - actual medicine.

So, in the past 24 hours, I have seen the bathtub more times than in the previous week (Epsom salts). I also had a bread and milk poultice placed on my leg last night, which in case you were wondering, smells like crap. The red area has decreased though, so it's not all bad. ;)

I probably sound really bitter, I just noticed, but what sucks the most is I did it to myself. Anyways, the moral of the story is, think really hard about exercising in the great outdoors. You may regret it when a bloodsucking parasite leaves you thinking about how much you want to scratch your leg while trying to distract yourself with Sherlock.

Thank you and have a nice day *elaborately curtsies*
:)